When you are sad -
I will help you plot revenge against the scum sucking bastard who made you sad.

When you are blue -
I'll try to dislodge whatever's choking you.

When you smile -
I'll know you finally got laid.

When you are scared -
I will rag you about it every chance I get.

When you are worried -
I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit whining

When you are confused -
I will use little words to explain it to your dumb ass.

When you are sick-
Stay away from me until your well again, I don't want whatever you have.

When you fall-
I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

This is my oath-
I pledge till the end. Why you may ask?
Because you're my friend